Snow. - Is it a con?
Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2006 3:24 amI have long since had the notion that snow is simply a Government device, invented purely to mask the work the little people do to the pavement below.
All the poppycock about snow being purely a weather element cannot hide this bear-faced fact:
The pavement is cleaner when the snow disappears.
"Ah, but that is because the snow melts to water, and washes the dirt away!" I hear you say!
Wrong! While the snow is in it's Government-funded prime, the little people set to work underneath it, cleaning the roads and pavements unseen.
They do this, as not only are they incredibly little, they are also hiddeously ugly. They don't want to hear the insults any more than we want to look at them.
You see, our Government is a bit daft. Rather than colonialise a patch of grass in the French wilderness where the little people could live freely, it decided to recind their passports and whore them out as sub-contracted street-sweepers.
The fact that snow ALWAYS stays on grass and fields longer, is merely due to the sheer amount of work required to clean them.
Thus solves the "Clean-after-a-light-dusting-of-snow-on-the-pavement" mystery.
All the poppycock about snow being purely a weather element cannot hide this bear-faced fact:
The pavement is cleaner when the snow disappears.
"Ah, but that is because the snow melts to water, and washes the dirt away!" I hear you say!
Wrong! While the snow is in it's Government-funded prime, the little people set to work underneath it, cleaning the roads and pavements unseen.
They do this, as not only are they incredibly little, they are also hiddeously ugly. They don't want to hear the insults any more than we want to look at them.
You see, our Government is a bit daft. Rather than colonialise a patch of grass in the French wilderness where the little people could live freely, it decided to recind their passports and whore them out as sub-contracted street-sweepers.
The fact that snow ALWAYS stays on grass and fields longer, is merely due to the sheer amount of work required to clean them.
Thus solves the "Clean-after-a-light-dusting-of-snow-on-the-pavement" mystery.
if it snows in liverpool it should snow like f*ckin billy-o over here 