Liverpool FC Forum

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 10:56 am**

hey all.
so i was t the pub for the gooner game (4 pints for a fiver!!!!) got there around 6 after already necking a fair few double southern comforts at home. watched the game,w e won, hugged too many people and then went onto the local. stayed there til 230 am, went back so some gals house (she was a psycho, i do not lie) she told me things that no human should have to hear and at 330 i decided to make a sharp exit...

so what happens at 330 in the morning when u r not totally sure where u r and it is poring with rain, an u have just literally run off froma psycho birds house?

yes, u realise you have left your keys in said psychos house/bedsit/scary place.

Now its 345am, im soaked, im kinda lost and no one is replying to my textas (apologies to the person on ehre i was texting, but i was drunk hehe)

so around 430am someone finally ipcks up, a mate ofmine who is not totally happy (neither is his missus who has already had to put up with me trying to force him down the pub to watch the footy.

Anyways, not all bad, i got into sleep around 6am, and wasnt at work til 9

(i calle in sick)

oh, and i cant go to my local for a few weeks... any other fun stories?

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:05 am**

Fun story??? Normal Saturday night, mate!!

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:10 am**

i havent mentioned the high heels and speed dating yet

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 11:52 am**

dawson99 wrote:hey all.
so i was t the pub for the gooner game (4 pints for a fiver!!!!) got there around 6 after already necking a fair few double southern comforts at home. watched the game,w e won, hugged too many people and then went onto the local. stayed there til 230 am, went back so some gals house (she was a psycho, i do not lie) she told me things that no human should have to hear and at 330 i decided to make a sharp exit...

I really wan to know the "things that no human should have to hear"!??!

Come one reveal all

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:28 pm**

i once did a runner in the morning from this bird's house and when i got to the bus stop i realised i'd forgotten my wallet and had to go back and knock on her door, looking a bit sheepish

oh the shame :no

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:31 pm**

ok...she said....

Her "you're much better than steve"

Me (happy) "oh yeah? and whos that...your boyfriend?"

Her (pause) "oh no"

Me (joking) "your pimp?"

Her " Nope"

Me "well?"

her....

wait for it

" My Brother"

:laugh:

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:37 pm**

hey dawson, thanks for the text mate! good result an all but do I really need to know you've lost your keys?? I was just on the vinegar stroke when that one landed - cheers!

She said " Whose texting you at this time big boy?"
I said " Oh it's dawson, he's lost his keys!"
she said" tell him to go around to mine, key is under the plant pot as usual, i'll see him there in half an hour"

bstd

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:39 pm**

sweet!!!!!
it was a class night, i did have a couple of drinks. and she doesnt need to leave the key there, i got a set

now here are the sort of things i like a woman to say

25 More Things You Will Never Hear A Woman Say...
I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class.
You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me.
My mother is going to take care of the tab, so order another round for you and your friends.
Don't get up, I kinda like sleeping in the wetspot.
I know I'm sore and my parents are in the other room, but I still want you right now!
That was fun, when will all of your friends be over to watch pornos again?
I bet it would be kinky to watch you with our baby-sitter Tracy.
Honey, did you leave that skid in the toilet bowl? Good one!
The new girl in my office is a stripper. I invited her over for dinner on Friday.
You're my daddy! You're my daddy!
While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover.
Bar food again!? Kick :censored:

.
Don't dirty up your T-shirt wiping that up, use my blouse.
That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm gonna go over and talk to her.
I love hearing stories about your old girlfriends, tell me more.
I like using this new lawn mower so much more than the old one, what a wonderful Valentine's day gift!
Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then you don't have to mess with it anymore.
I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want 'em?
It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple more pitchers.
Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila shot off of Chuck's bare :censored:

!
This porno scene is boring, fast forward to the gang bang.
I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again.
Damn! I love when my pillow smells like your cigars and scotch. You passed out before brushing your teeth again, ya' big silly!
You are so much smarter than my father.
If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let me watch Grandstand.

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:49 pm**

Woollyback wrote:looking a bit sheepish

You looked normal then, what with the Woollyback, and all!!

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 12:57 pm**

hawkmoon269 wrote:
Woollyback wrote:looking a bit sheepish

You looked normal then, what with the Woollyback, and all!!

b'dum tsch

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 1:23 pm**

I will get my thinking head on........with being in bands and spending many a night away from home,their are plenty........sad thing is it seems so long ago......

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 4:02 pm**

ahhhhh im still living that dream phil old boy! bring on the groupies!

Posted: **Thu Feb 16, 2006 4:10 pm**

I was at the bar in Belfast last christmas ,and a guy was standing beside me,holding a £20 note in his hand. His gang were starting trouble with another group beside me and all of a sudden all hell broke loose :oh:

fisticuffs......so i being the gentleman that i am...kindly relieved him of the £20 note he had left me sitting on the bar-into my skyrocket it went

Just my way of charging him for damages he might have cost

Liverpool FC Forum

More tales of pubbiness - Any more?

More tales of pubbiness - Any more?