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by **Woollyback** » Mon Sep 07, 2009 4:04 pm

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on thatmorning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone " HappyBirthday."

I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids... surely they'll remember.
But my kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss,and by the way "Happy Birthday !" It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said "You know,It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday,what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me."

I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day.
Let's go !"

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table.

We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a
beautiful day...

We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?"
I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind ?"

She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner."

After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,

" Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a
moment. I'll be right back."

"Ok." I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out
carrying a huge birthday cake ...

Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers,

all singing "Happy Birthday".

And I just sat there...

On the couch...

Naked.

by **Ben Patrick** » Mon Sep 07, 2009 4:26 pm

Thats class that, imagine that happening to you.

Every single fella would get caught out there,

by **Madmax** » Tue Sep 08, 2009 12:53 am

top stuff!!

by **Judge** » Tue Sep 08, 2009 7:49 am

knowing woolly thats probably a true story

by **Big Niall** » Tue Sep 08, 2009 1:44 pm

"I couldn't risk the candles burning these beautiful trousers and boxers you bought me last year" would me the first thing I'd say to the Mrs.

by **Greavesie** » Tue Sep 08, 2009 2:03 pm

holy feck I have no idea what I'd say

by **ConnO'var** » Wed Sep 09, 2009 1:44 pm

by **Judge** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 7:53 am

i'd say ''sh'it happens''

by **aCe'** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 8:17 am

brilliant...

by **Bad Bob** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 10:54 am

Hold up, Woolls, I thought your secretary was a chubbo that you weren't interested in? Smelled of chips or something?

by **Judge** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 12:57 pm

that was probably him who smelt once he took his boxers off

by **Roger Red Hat** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 5:13 pm

why did I fire my secretary?

by **Roger Red Hat** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 5:16 pm

hmmm yum yum...

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