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Postby metalhead » Sun May 03, 2009 7:31 pm

steal the vibrator from maypax, but...
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Postby Judge » Sun May 03, 2009 8:59 pm

barry still smarting from his inpotent encounter with megan, grabbed said vibro and inserted it into MH. judge had nwt to do with it, as maypax, baz and MH were raving chutney ferrets, who were off to a toga party.

enough of this perverse shouted judge, the others were embarrassed, and the story took more of a serious turn.....................
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Postby NANNY RED » Sun May 03, 2009 9:37 pm

When Nanny Red decided to ring the men in the white coates
HE WHO BETRAYS WILL ALWAYS WALK ALONE
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Postby dawson99 » Sun May 03, 2009 10:08 pm

The three men in white coats had been awaiting the call for some time. the tallest of the three men, Parker, had only been working with the other two for three months now. He did not yet know what he was gettnig himself into, but he was intrigued, not only by the money he was being paid, but also by the technology they would all be using.

As the phone rung Parker looked at Stevens, the most senior member of the three. Stevens was the one who would pick up the phone initially, as he had done so many times before.

A sense of excitement filled the room, as all three men knew that they would soon be asked to perform a task only they could, or indeed would, perform.

They were all getting better at the task they would soon be fulfilling, Stevens as always would take control, and Parker would be given the more menial tasks.

Harris, the tallest of the three, and also the quietest, would, as always, be doing the more laborious part of the job.

This did not bother Parker at all though, since he was still new to the company and would prefer to watch the expert craftsman that someday he wished he would take over from...
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Postby Judge » Mon May 04, 2009 11:58 am

dawson99 wrote:The three men in white coats had been awaiting the call for some time. the tallest of the three men, Parker, had only been working with the other two for three months now. He did not yet know what he was gettnig himself into, but he was intrigued, not only by the money he was being paid, but also by the technology they would all be using.

As the phone rung Parker looked at Stevens, the most senior member of the three. Stevens was the one who would pick up the phone initially, as he had done so many times before.

A sense of excitement filled the room, as all three men knew that they would soon be asked to perform a task only they could, or indeed would, perform.

They were all getting better at the task they would soon be fulfilling, Stevens as always would take control, and Parker would be given the more menial tasks.

Harris, the tallest of the three, and also the quietest, would, as always, be doing the more laborious part of the job.

This did not bother Parker at all though, since he was still new to the company and would prefer to watch the expert craftsman that someday he wished he would take over from...

somewhat confusion erupted in the room, when two of the white coated men realised they were both the tallest in the room.................  :D
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Postby dawson99 » Mon May 04, 2009 4:04 pm

you found my quandry... they are all actually only one man you would have found out later lol

just trying to add some eloquence to the story
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Postby Bad Bob » Mon May 04, 2009 4:32 pm

dawson99 wrote:they are all actually only one man

...said Special Supervisory Agent Aaron Hotchner. 

His colleague from the FBI's Behavioral Analysis Unit, David Rossi, turned to the local sheriff and said: "Assemble your men--we're ready to give a profile of the Unsub."

Ten minutes later, in the bullpen of the Grant County Sheriff's Department, the members of the BAU took it in turns to walk the local police through their carefully assembled profile.

"The Unsub is a white male in his mid to late 40s," began SSA Derek Morgan.  "He's tall and his white lab coat suggests that he works in some sort of medical facility or scientific laboratory."

Dr. Spencer Reid continued the profile: "This unsub has suffered a psychotic break in the recent past and is manifesting at least three distinct personalities."

"Stevens is the dominant personality," interjected SSA Emily Prentice.  "He's aggressive and demands absolute submission from both Parker and Harris."

David Rossi stepped forward and addressed the attentive officers: "We think that Parker is the one that does the actual killing and mutilating of the bodies."  He paused for effect.  "He carves a 'P' into the chest of each victim--just beneath the clavical."

It was Hotch's turn: "Harris is the quiet, festidious one.  He'll do all the clean-up and disposal."

A hand is raised and an officer at the back of the room speaks: "Which one's the original personality?"

"Actually, none of them are," Reid replied.  "We think that the original fragile personality has bifurcated into 3 distinct aspects of the Unsub's psyche.  He may not even be called Stevens, Parker or Harris.  Those names are just as likely to have been borrowed from people in his environment--people that exemplify the archetypes his fractured psyche now manifests."

"There will be a stresser--some traumatic event in the Unsub's life that will have produced this psychotic break," Morgan insisted.  "A loss of job; the breakdown of a relationship; the death of a loved one--something that pushed this guy over the edge.  Find that and we find out why this guy needs to kill."

The profile delivered, the BAU agents retreated to their command post in the conference room, while the Sheriff instructed his men on how to proceed.
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Postby andy_g » Mon May 04, 2009 6:08 pm

"ok, men - listen up. i'm only going to say this once" growled the sheriff

"take 1/2 oz strawberry Schnapps, 1 oz light rum, 1 oz lime juice, 1 tsp powdered sugar and 1 oz strawberries. not raspberries, rossi, ok? now... shake all the ingredients with ice, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve. make sure the secretary gets one. then clean your guns."
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Get Down! everybody's gonna leave their seat
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Postby metalhead » Mon May 04, 2009 6:11 pm

and so the officers set off to get those rare ingredients only found in special places, however the mystery of the personalty remains unsolved and Agent Hotchner is dispatched to the nearest brothel to get some clues, when suddenly...
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Postby Bad Bob » Mon May 04, 2009 8:26 pm

He turned a corner and encountered the People's Front of Judea huddled in the corner, engaged in heated, conspiratorial whispering.

"Are you the Judean People's Front?" the officer inquired.

"F.uck off," Reg said in a rage.  "Judean People's Front. We're the People's Front of Judea! Judean People's Front. Cawk."

The officer flushed with embarassment before timidly asking, "Can I... join your group?"

Reg's reply was as curt as it was harsh: "No. P!ss off."
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Postby dawson99 » Mon May 04, 2009 8:32 pm

So he asked...Is there someone else up there we can talk to?
To which the reply came: No, now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.

So heleft, wandering the roads, head down, upset at the world.
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Postby Judge » Tue May 05, 2009 7:55 am

he heeded off to find one man who was as tall as two.....
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Postby metalhead » Tue May 05, 2009 6:09 pm

Big Shows and elegant as the ancient King Xerez himself. This being was only found in one place, that is...
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Postby NANNY RED » Tue May 05, 2009 6:37 pm

Newkit,So off he trawled through the strrets looking for this place. He had heard there was some deranged people there but he was ready,......
HE WHO BETRAYS WILL ALWAYS WALK ALONE
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Postby Madmax » Wed May 06, 2009 12:50 am

to join this cult.. The witch of chemlenstronford had told him that once you enter theres no turning back but like any villiage idiot the fool ignored the advice given to him and set forth in search of the people from newkit. As he...
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