Liverpool FC Forum

by **Kharhaz** » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:07 pm

BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh :censored:

BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh :censored:

eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

Classy !

by **account deleted by request** » Thu Aug 21, 2008 11:15 pm

pmsl

by **daxy1** » Fri Aug 22, 2008 12:39 am

Boy: I turn you around to lick your :censored:

.
Boy: I pry apart that battleship you call your :censored:

.
Boy: I see :censored:

nuggets hanging from the hair around your :censored:

.
Girl: WTF?!?!?

hahahaha! this :censored:

awesome lol sh!t nuggets hahaha!

by **Toffeehater** » Fri Aug 22, 2008 2:26 am

metalhead wrote:Another bloodninja classic

bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKate: Who are you?
bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKate: Haha! OK
DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
**pause**
DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
**pause**
DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
bloodninja: How did you know?
bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
DirtyKate: What the f**k?
DirtyKate: You perverted piece of s**t
DirtyKate: F**k
--------------

legend

pmsl!

by **Toffeehater** » Fri Aug 22, 2008 2:27 am

VictimX_27: Hi there!
cheesedog: HEYA!
VictimX_27: What u up 2?
cheesedog: Nice English.
cheesedog: Did you learn that on the short bus?
VictimX_27: Get :censored:

cheesedog: I'm just joking relax
VictimX_27:
cheesedog: What's your name?
VictimX_27: Whats yours?
cheesedog: I asked you first.
VictimX_27: I asked you second
cheesedog: Did I time just warp to middle school?
VictimX_27: huh
cheesedog: Never mind. My name is Johnny
cheesedog: Johnny Cheesedog
VictimX_27: Thats not your real name
cheesedog: Why isn't that my real name?
VictimX_27: No one has the name Cheesedog as a last name
cheesedog: Well I do. Whats wrong with it?
VictimX_27: Nothin i suppose
VictimX_27: Is that your real pic in that av?
cheesedog: Yes it is
VictimX_27: Very handsome
cheesedog: Thanks
VictimX_27: You kinda look like eminem
cheesedog: :censored:

you.
VictimX_27: HEY! I meant that in a good way
VictimX_27: I think eminem is hot!
cheesedog: Oh. You think I'm hot?
VictimX_27: Yeah
cheesedog: What do you look like?
cheesedog: Do you have a pic?
VictimX_27: I don't show my picture to anyone
cheesedog: Why not?
VictimX_27: Cause I'm ugly
cheesedog: I won't make fun of you
VictimX_27: Its not that. I just don't like my looks
cheesedog: So you have no self-esteem, huh?
cheesedog: Is that what you're saying?
VictimX_27: I just don't think I'm pretty
cheesedog: Let me be the judge of that.
VictimX_27: Nahhh
cheesedog: Then describe yourself.
VictimX_27: Why do u wanna know what I look like?
cheesedog: Because I think you're nice
cheesedog: I want to picture you in my head while I'm talking to you.
VictimX_27: LMAO!! You don't want 2 picture me. Trust me
cheesedog: Why not?
VictimX_27: I told you. I'm ugly.
cheesedog: Well... I think you're beautiful on the inside.
VictimX_27: You don't even know me
cheesedog: I'm a pretty good judge of character
VictimX_27: Then why do u need 2 see me?
cheesedog: I just wanted to know thats all
cheesedog: If you aren't comfortable with it... thats fine.
VictimX_27: You don't understand
cheesedog: Is it that bad?
VictimX_27: YESSSSS
cheesedog: Ok then. I'm gonna picture you as Weezy from the Jeffersons.
cheesedog: She is the bomb!
cheesedog: She makes me hot just thinking about her!
VictimX_27: Wheezy?
cheesedog: Yep. Weezy.
VictimX_27: Who is that?
cheesedog: George's wife.
VictimX_27: Who is george
cheesedog: George Jefferson. From the Jeffersons.
cheesedog: Are you :censored:

deaf?
VictimX_27: Who are the Jeffersons?
cheesedog: Oh lord. Here we go
VictimX_27: wut?
cheesedog: You don't know who the Jeffersons are?
VictimX_27: Should I?
cheesedog: Yes.
VictimX_27: Well I don't.
cheesedog: FISH DONT FRY IN THE KITCHEN! BEANS DONT BURN ON THE GREEEELL...
VictimX_27: huhhh?
cheesedog: TOOK A WHOOOOLE LOTTA LU UH VINNNN. JUST TO GET UP THAT HEEEELL
VictimX_27: Wut the hell are you saying?
cheesedog: Hold on a second
cheesedog: Here you go. *PIC*
VictimX_27: Thats her?
cheesedog: Yep
VictimX_27: I don't look anything like that
cheesedog: SHUT UP! You're ruining my fantasy!
VictimX_27: LOL. You're funny.
cheesedog: What's funny?
VictimX_27: u r
cheesedog: I'm glad I entertain you
VictimX_27: me 2
cheesedog: So if you don't look like Weezy, what do you look like?
VictimX_27: u don't give up do u?
cheesedog: Never
VictimX_27: I'm the exact opposite of her
cheesedog:

VictimX_27: I'm very white
cheesedog: Thats cool, my white anti-soul sista'
VictimX_27: LOL
cheesedog: I can dig white chicks too, I guess.
VictimX_27: I'm whiter than most
cheesedog: really?
VictimX_27: I'm an albino
cheesedog: a what?
VictimX_27: u don't know what that is?
cheesedog: I've heard the word before
VictimX_27: I have no pigment in my skin, eyes or hair
VictimX_27: So I'm all white
cheesedog: This is :censored:

VictimX_27: I'm serious!
VictimX_27: You've never seen an albino before?
cheesedog: No. Where do they live? Albinia?
VictimX_27: No, we live all over.
cheesedog: Then how come I've never seen any
VictimX_27: Lucky I suppose
cheesedog: Send me your picture. I wanna know what an albino looks like.
VictimX_27: I'll send you a picture of one but not me
cheesedog: Ok
VictimX_27: Here u go *PIC*
cheesedog: Whoa. Thats freaky
VictimX_27: See why I don't send my picture out?
cheesedog: there's nothing wrong with it.
cheesedog: It doesn't make you ugly
cheesedog: This chick is kind of hot actually.
VictimX_27: Thank u
cheesedog: No problem
cheesedog: Her, not you. I don't know what you look like.
VictimX_27: Are you gonna be on in 3 hours?
cheesedog: Yes
VictimX_27: I have to go to the mall with my sister
VictimX_27: Will you be here when I get back?
cheesedog: S ure. Then I'll sex you up.
VictimX_27: Gee thanks. LOL
cheesedog: I'm serious
VictimX_27: We'll see.
cheesedog: Yes we will.
VictimX_27: Bye for now!
cheesedog: Make sure you wear some sunscreen.
VictimX_27: <USER HAS LOGGED OUT>

About 3 hours later...

VictimX_27: HEY!
cheesedog: Hello there
VictimX_27: I'm back
cheesedog: Have fun at the mall?
VictimX_27: Yeah. I got some new shoes
cheesedog: Interesting
VictimX_27: Not really. Just shoes
cheesedog: You ready to be sexed up now?
VictimX_27: LOL
cheesedog: Is that a yes?
VictimX_27: Could be
VictimX_27:
cheesedog: HOT DAMN!
cheesedog: I gently suck your nipples
cheesedog: I feel them get hard then I jam my hand down your..
VictimX_27: WOAH! Slow down cowboy
cheesedog: Why?
VictimX_27: I'm not just gonna cyber with you if thats all you want
cheesedog: What do you mean?
VictimX_27: You're not going to ignore me later are you?
cheesedog: Of course not.
cheesedog: I like you.
VictimX_27: I don't even know how old you are.
cheesedog: I'm 27. Now....
cheesedog: I gently massage your breasts with my rough hands
cheesedog: I roll your nipples between my fingers
VictimX_27: WAIT!
cheesedog: They get hard again... what?
VictimX_27: Don't you wanna know anything about me first?
VictimX_27: Like what I like?
cheesedog: Oh yeah. Sure. Hurry up.
VictimX_27: That didn't sound convincing.
cheesedog: YES I WANNA KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!
VictimX_27: Now u r being a smartass
VictimX_27: Just give me a minute
cheesedog: ok
VictimX_27: I'm back
cheesedog: np
VictimX_27: thank you
cheesedog: So what do you like?
VictimX_27: Ummmm being licked
cheesedog: Where?
VictimX_27: Everywhere
cheesedog: Any place in particular?
VictimX_27: uhhh yeah
cheesedog: tell me
VictimX_27: on my clit
cheesedog: OK!
cheesedog: NOW YOU'RE TALKIN!
VictimX_27: I also like being done from behind
cheesedog: Ooooooohhhh.
cheesedog: Ok. Check this out.
cheesedog: We're in an abandoned building.
cheesedog: No is around. Its all quiet.
VictimX_27: Uh huh
cheesedog: I gently unbutton your pants and slide my hand across your clit
cheesedog: You get all warm and juicy.
cheesedog: I slip your panties down and continue to massage your pussy
VictimX_27: oooohh mmmm
cheesedog: I place my mouth on your pussy as I eat you from behind
cheesedog: I wiggle my tounge around across your moist hole
VictimX_27: yessss
cheesedog: I cover your ears with my hands as I eat you.
cheesedog: Egon and Ray sneak in from the back.
cheesedog: *Powering up Proton packs*
VictimX_27:

cheesedog: Then... Egon BLASTS your pasty white :censored:

!!
cheesedog: POW!! BZZZZZTTTTTPHTTTTTT!!!
cheesedog: Winston and Peter set up the containment trap....
VictimX_27: WHAT THE :censored:

IS THIS

!!!
cheesedog: You wiggle around in the proton streams buck naked
cheesedog: The streams almost cross! Look out!!
cheesedog: Peter smacks you across the chin with his gun
cheesedog: They open the trap and it sucks your pale :censored:

in!
VictimX_27: This isn't funny johnny!
cheesedog: SHUT UP! YOUR CAUGHT!
cheesedog: **puts you in the containment area**
cheesedog: Slimer is in there too..
VictimX_27: YOU ARE A :censored:

!
cheesedog: I SAID SHUT THE :censored:

UP!
cheesedog: Now...Slimer sticks his green, slimey :censored:

in your pigmentless :censored:

.
cheesedog: **HE SLIMES YOU!**
VictimX_27: Never talk to me again!
cheesedog: He cums all over your hair... but no one notices cause its the same color
VictimX_27: :censored:

YOUUUU
cheesedog: He eats a powdered donut!
VictimX_27: SHUT UP AND :censored:

YOUUUU!!!!!
cheesedog: o wait! It was your hand, you scary, white whore!
VictimX_27: LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
cheesedog: Chill out, Casper. You're trapped, I said.
cheesedog: Slimer goes to lick your clit.
cheesedog: But there is already slime on your it!!
cheesedog: Slimer thinks you are a cheater and gets jealous!!
cheesedog: HE RIPS YOUR WHITE TITS OFF!
VictimX_27: :censored:

YOU!!!!!!!!
cheesedog: **Plays volleyball with them**
VictimX_27: <USER HAS LOGGED OUT>

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

by **Kharhaz** » Fri Aug 22, 2008 3:04 am

I was laughing at this particular topic earlier and my missus pointed this out. She said:
"If I had a daughter in a place like this, I would be worried sick. Not because of the lads, and what they post, but because all the girls seem to take this cyber sex really seriously !"

And looking at these, they do. Me and my missus had a chat and I said, "Always, you hear about lads and there libido, and how they want it always, you hear on the news of young lads getting there end away but always the girls are innocent, its not there fault"

As funny as this particular topic is, it does raise quesions.

by **Fo Dne** » Fri Aug 22, 2008 3:10 am

The Robe and the Wizard hat bit the second time round makes me cry with laughter. One of the funnyest things av ever read in my entire life!!

Possibly the best thread ever!

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