Liverpool FC Forum

by **Kharhaz** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:54 am

An Example

Now the chances are that when many of you look at the link I have shown you will see below it the 10 Rules of a flat stomach link below which will give the answer to the question asked !

It is also football free season so we (as men) resort to sex to pass the time and many questions will pop as in "although you have VD will I do?" depending on how fit they are, for this though we are talking about frigid people (men and women) although I doubt many men are frigid even if the women they are with do weigh 45 stone (there are some sick people out there !)

How do you get past the "Not tonight darl, I have a headache, rash, sh!ts, crabs, herpes"

Now I myself have asked do I demand sex a lot, and no I dont, but when I do ask an excuse comes up as to why she cant. And many of my mates have been in the same situation, its not down to the smell of beer,its not down to working all day and smelling of BO its down to simply this, she is due on, and this is where she works it, I really want it but im really heavy ! The woman isnt frigid, she has wanted it for weeks, but rather than see her partner enjoy himself, she would much rather enjoy herself watching him squirm, but there is a good thing for men, we have "Midlife Crisis" women have "Menopause" ! and forever onwards we can call her an "old crone" ! and we men end up with a motorbike !

by **Emerald Red** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 7:02 am

Right, what the fuck?!

by **andy_g** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 8:38 am

weren't you also the one that said it was important for you to mark your territory by taking a big smelly dump and making sure the stench spread throughout the house? have you asked your wife if she finds this a turn on or not?

by **dawson99** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 8:48 am

i just think kharhaz is doing something wrong :;):

by **7_Kewell** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 1:46 pm

Kharhaz, had you been drinking when you posted this

by **Effes** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:22 pm

Kharhaz wrote:The woman isnt frigid, she has wanted it for weeks, but rather than see her partner enjoy himself, she would much rather enjoy herself watching him squirm,

Relate are good to talk to Kharhaz:

http://www.relate.org.uk/

by **Effes** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 3:24 pm

Did your wife read this thread?

http://www.liverpoolfc-newkit.co.uk/viewtopic.php?t=24615

Is this what puts her off?

by **Kharhaz** » Mon Jul 28, 2008 12:28 am

Actually I wasnt talking about my missus, you see me and some mates of mine was comparing women and we all had one thing in common, they hate us ! But looking at the responses on here (aside from the dumping one, as we all know go in the bog after a woman and you are lucky to escape with your life!) I can see what im doing wrong.....im spending my evenings on this bloody forum rather than with her !

by **Kharhaz** » Mon Jul 28, 2008 12:28 am

7_Kewell wrote:Kharhaz, had you been drinking when you posted this

YES !

by **Judge** » Tue Jul 29, 2008 8:48 am

Kharhaz wrote:Actually I wasnt talking about my missus, you see me and some mates of mine was comparing women and we all had one thing in common, they hate us ! But looking at the responses on here (aside from the dumping one, as we all know go in the bog after a woman and you are lucky to escape with your life!) I can see what im doing wrong.....im spending my evenings on this bloody forum rather than with her !

who hates you? your mates

by **laza** » Tue Jul 29, 2008 9:02 am

I thought reading the title this was thread about having sex with snowmen or snowwomen

by **Roger Red Hat** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 1:30 pm

OK, so your trying to bone your sheila and you know she wont be up for it from the off so you do the following...

1. take a shower. Women hate dirty smelly men. (dont forget to scrub under the rim)
2. Dim lighting in the bedroom.
3. show her attention. touch her body gently.
4. Talk nicely to her. (dont mention you reckon her younger sister needs sorting out)
5. Try to advance real slowly, no sudden movements.

If this fails...

1. throw her onto the bed, pillow over her head and help yerself.

If she resists and hurls abuse at you then sleeps in the other room then put on a porno and have a 'barclays bank'. Then admit it that she's either fed up of you or she's getting boned by someone else.

by **Judge** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 5:05 pm

lee always fails and goes for his second option at all times

Liverpool FC Forum

Frigid partners, - And the future solution !

Who is online