by anfieldadorer » Thu Jun 16, 2005 6:54 pm
football356
Dear Rafa,
Well done you jammy bloody b***ard.
No, really I mean that. Really, really well done. I'd say 'congratulations' but it's too difficult to make myself understood through gritted teeth. Come to think of it, it's just too difficult to make myself understood.
No, really well done. Or at least Milan were.
Let me just say that one more time in case you don't believe me - well done you lucky thieving b***ards.
There was nothing I wanted more than to see you cheat, sorry Rafa of course I mean 'beat' AC Milan. I had a drink straight after the final whistle and, to be honest, I haven't stopped drinking since...
I think that sums up exactly how I feel about your 'victory'.
(Sorry, by the way, about the red wine stain).
Anyway, Rafa, because I'm a knight of the realm and because I have half a bottle to finish before Cathy wants me in bed, I thought I'd treat you to my tactical analysis of each of your Champions League matches...
15-Sep-04 H Monaco W 2-0
Verdict: Youse were lucky.
28-Sep-04 A Olympiakos L 0-1
Verdict: A fair result.
19-Oct-04 H Deportivo D 0-0
Verdict. More than youse deserved. Lucky.
03-Nov-04 A Deportivo W 1-0
Verdict: Youse only won with an own goal so that doesnae count.
23-Nov-04 A Monaco L 0-1
Verdict: Result reflected the play. Except youse were lucky to get nil.
08-Dec-04 H Olympiakos W 3-1
Verdict: Youse lucky b***ards. That Gerrard goal was a mis-hit (he's rubbish, BTW, but I'll take him off your hands because I like you).
22-Feb-05 H Bayer Leverkusen W 3-1
Verdict: Youse were lucky there.
09-Mar-05 A Bayer Leverkusen W 3-1
Verdict: Youse were very lucky there.
05-Apr-05 H Juventus W 2-1
Verdict: Youse lost the second half 1-0. Lucky.
13-Apr-05 A Juventus D 0-0
Verdict: Who are Juventus anyway? I've never heard of them. Who have they ever played?
27-Apr-05 A Chelsea D 0-0
Verdict: We would have beaten them.
03-May-05 H Chelsea W 1-0 (1-0)
Verdict: Youse were lucky. That Luis Garcia 'goal' was like the one at OT from that Mendes chap - not over the line.
My memory of the final is a wee bit blurry but I do know that youse were lucky.
You'd never see the great Manchester United winning a Champions League final after being outplayed by the opposition and making a sneaky comeback.
But you're only Liverpool, so I suppose youse have different standards to us. Did I mention that we've won the Premiership eight times? And with the referees conspiring against us (not like youse lot - when was the last time anyone got a penalty at Anfield?).
I also noticed that all your goals came from set-pieces. The only one that didn't was a mis-hit. So that doesnae count.
There's no way my Manchester United would win a Champions League final in such an undignified manner against superior opposition. No way at all.
I also liked your canny trick of starting with Harry Kewell. Aye, clever that. He's not your player so you thought you'd demonstrate on the biggest stage of all what a complete waste of money he was. Youse a f***ing genius, Rafa.
I bet Gerard Houllier feels stupid for signing him now. I said as much at the time.
I hope I've been some help - and remember, I'll take that boy Gerrard off your hands in exchange for Kleberson. He's a World Cup winner, you know...
Sir Alex Ferguson (you can call me Sir Alex)
