Liverpool FC Forum

by **Madmax** » Mon Sep 13, 2010 7:40 pm

old mcdonald sh*gged a sheep eya eya yow..

by **Kharhaz** » Wed Sep 15, 2010 10:01 pm

Which of us is the opposite sex?

Is a lesbian a pansy without a stalk?

Is camping loitering within tent?

Is Red Riding Hood a Russian contraceptive?

Is Johnny Cash the change from a condom vending machine?

Is a castrated pig disgruntled?

Does the lateral coital position mean having a bit on the side?

Can a self made man pull himself to pieces?

Do fur covered toilet seats tickle your fancy?

Is a lady barrister without briefs a solicitor?

by **bunglemark2** » Wed Sep 15, 2010 11:00 pm

George Michael is to release a new single dedicated to his skinhead cell mate. It's called Hairless Fister.

by **bunglemark2** » Thu Sep 16, 2010 5:41 pm

The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner.
Talk about Dyson with death.

by **SouthCoastShankly** » Thu Sep 16, 2010 5:52 pm

George Michael has been found in his cell with a chocolate bar up his :censored:

. A prison spokesperson said it was just a careless Wispa...

by **bunglemark2** » Thu Sep 16, 2010 10:21 pm

I really wish everyone would just get off George Michael's back.

The warden says it's my turn now.

by **Kharhaz** » Thu Sep 16, 2010 11:50 pm

A reporter was interviewing a local couple who been married for 50 years and wanted to know what the secret was to a healthy marriage.

The husband said "well, when we was first wed, we agreed all the minor decisions were to be taken by my misssus and the major ones are to be taken from me. Therefore, our new house, the kids school and the like were to be decided by my wife"

The reporter was intrigued and continued as the husband finished his tale,

"And I decided how to solve the crisis in the middle east, global warming and what to do with nuclear weapons..."

by **Fauxy** » Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:40 am

Wayne Rooney's been arrested for shoplifting a packet of Cherry Bakewells. He explained to police that he'd promised Coleen never to pay for another tart again.

by **GRAHAM01** » Fri Sep 17, 2010 5:13 am

by **brentd4** » Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:57 pm

my friend said i dont understand irony, which is ironic cos we were at the bus station at the time.

by **Scottbot** » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:15 am

Why did the sperm cross the road?

Because I put on the wrong sock this morning

by **bunglemark2** » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:35 am

Girls: If you get a message from your boyfriend saying that he wants to "kick your puppy", don't call the RSPCA...He's just not very good at predictive text.

by **bunglemark2** » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:36 am

I've just been having trouble getting onto the internet so I rang up my service provider.He said, "Have you tried disabling cookies?" I said, "Well, I once bit the legs off a gingerbread man."

by **bunglemark2** » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:37 am

Chinese man missing, presumed dead. His family can't bereave it.

by **neil** » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:45 am

Please stop mate, please.

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