Liverpool FC Forum

[drummerphil]

Drummerphil 1

I think I need to post 5 long posts,to say what I need to say, so please bear with me before you reply.I’m not quite sure how many letters I can use in one post.
HELLO to all my dear friends on here.YES ITS ME and finally after 8 weeks of pleading and begging nursing staff to contact the hospital IT / Networking Dept to come and see me for 10 minutes they finally turned up.No thanks to the nursing staff though. I lay here last week and wrote a 4 page letter that took me 3 days and got it posted to the IT Director on Friday once I found his name out.They turned up with a laptop yesterday complete with a Liverpool fc screensaver and internet access overwhelmed is not a strong enough word to express how I feel for their actions.
Firstly I have to say that you people on here, are the most wonderful people I have had the pleasure of knowing and although you have kept me going for the last year from my own bed at home,with your friendship,warmth and good humour.The things you have done these last few weeks is a credit to you all and I’m man enough to admit had me in tears several times.
Johnnymac,Supersub and St Micheal thanks lads for allowing so many different threads to be posted about me,and for welcoming my fiancée Karen and helping her to post.
Ciggy,Zara,Leon,Mikz,Lando,Big Mick,Sabre etc etc etc etc I apologise if not mentioned but I could mention hundreds,thankyou for your concern and again for taking the time to welcome Karen either on here or by telephone.Karen is very non compliant on the internet really and this is the very first forum she has been on.

[drummerphil]

The messages she has been able to print off and bring here to me as well as the cards I’ve received have meant the world to me and like I said earlier had me in tears THANKS EVERYONE THANKS.
When I heard about the pay pal account and other money arriving in the post it completely knocked me out,I feel so undeserving of your generosity.I think you guys raised about £350 or close too and in our current situation that is a lot of money which I truly truly thank you for.
Now for an update on this vile illness.
Quite simply the situation is dire.In October last year I was cleared from Cancer I had got in July,a month earlier in June I also got hit by an articulated lorry on the motorway,so all in all it was a nightmare summer,thankgod our champions league victory had given me something to feel top of the world about.
I had two cancer operations in July and August to remove the melanoma (cancer) and in October I had a CT scan on the area that had been operated on and told all the cancer had gone.I came on here and told everyone if I remember and got some very gracious comments.
What most of you don’t know is although I got the all clear on the cancer my mobility and other problems got worst.We obviously thought then all the mobility problems were down to the accident I had on the motorway and not cancer related at all.
So since October I have been under the hospital for physio and hydrotherapy ever week which to be honest achieved nothing and I still got worst.

[drummerphil]

I was basically bed bound and couldn’t walk any further than 20 yards without a walking stick,couldn’t sit upright in a chair any longer than 20 minutes,and stand up  any longer than 10 minutes without severe back and leg pain.Around December infact the first time was Christmas eve I had what I thought was a heart attack which lasted around 20 minutes,I had never felt chest pain like it.The hospital checked me out and because I had no mobility for so long, my weight  had ballooned,blood pressure was at dangerous levels and cholestoral was in double figures.I was told I had Angina on top of everything else.It was also around December my taste buds (palette) started to go haywire and all recognised foods I knew stopped tasting the same i.e. weetabix would taste like a bowl of salt,chocolate would taste like sour milk,fruit juices i.e. ribina would taste like shoe polish etc.I’ve not enjoyed a correct tasting meal for ages.
Then my hearing packed in in my right ear and  from December to March was half deaf.The hearing has partically come back but this week the left one has started acting up.The worst thing since December though was yet to come and then in January my teeth started cracking in half,fillings dropped out and I  have constant gum disease,ulcers and the pain is horrific.I have to numb my entire mouth area before I can talk,eat or drink with a painkilling gel.
8 weeks ago I fainted at home after waking up with severe head pains and we rang an ambulance and went to our local A and E department.They did a CT scan of my head and noticed a 3cm x 4cm patch of cancer on my brain.Its known as a metastatic brain cancer and is fatal,its spread from the original one I got all cleared from in October which beggers the question why didn’t they scan my head back then,along side the area they had operated on.?

[drummerphil]

I have been given 6-12 months to live and even though I’ve had 15 full radiotherapy treatments on my Brain,which have shrank the cancer,I’ve been told today that even if the whole thing disappears from view I still have it because metastatic brain cancer is a b@stard and stays in the brain ready to grow again.Radiotherapy should basically help with the pain and hopefully help my other symptoms like my walking problems,mouth problems,hearing problems etc.Incidently all these other problems have been blamed on the brain cancer because the brain can shut down and mess with anything it wants too as its our computer and cancer there can cause untold problems.
I will die from this,could be tomorrow,could be 10 years from now everyday I have to battle and pray I can win this.Its the worst cancer you can have because with the brain you have no idea whats next.Over the last year my emotions have been in turmoil,over the last 8 weeks I have been a complete wreck.Lando thanks for coming to see me mate I needed that hour to snap me out of the chronic depression I’m in. If only for an hour you’re a star.
I lie in this bed and worry about everything Karen,the Kids,Cancer,debt we have accumulated with me being off work so long,the mortgage you name it,I worry about it.Karen tells me off and tells me to concentrate on getting well but its hard too,when losing your house,car etc could happen because Karen has had to finish work too to be my carer.We will probably end up in some council run disabled bungalow,but that hurts me because Karens had our house 15 years and I’ve been there 6 and I feel right guilty I’m putting her through this,she is a very special lady and I love her dearly

[112-1077774096]

welcome back phil, good to see you here. you make me feel humble. we all have our problems that sometime seem massive to us to be honest everything bad i ever had happen to me pales into insignificance reading about your illness.

i know we have never been close on here although at the same time we have never had cross words, but hand on heart mate i have to say its great that i see you name starting a thread and i hope there are many more to come

[drummerphil]

Funny enough although when I came in here I was in great pain and obviously my mind was distracted by no end of things,I would always welcome Karen with the same question when she arrived.Have the board offered Robbie a new contract and if yes how long ?.So you can see how I still had my priorities right………lol
Actually Robbie if you read any of this any chance you might have a cheap bungalow you fancy renting out about £20 a week…………lol
If not don’t worry your still the man.
Anyway lads we won the FA CUP and finished 1 point behind 2nd place a good season in my book and proud of their efforts.I never saw the final apart from a few minutes because the nurses drugged me up because I was getting a bit loud.I haven’t seen any world cup warm up games either cant seem to get in the mood with everything that’s happening.When you have had 5 tv channels and no internet stuck in bed for 8 weeks its being like been in prison.I have 5 treatments left and will be home I think either on the 16th or 19th of this month.I will be bed bound and equipment such as a special hospital bed should be in place by then.If near Stoke please pop in for a cuppa.You are special friends, also Karen has sent jonnymac a mobile number you can text me on here in hospital I have on silent.I leave you for now and can honestly say its taken a week to type this because of my severe memory loss i.m getting after treatments,I even told my mother to go last week as I had no idea who she was.I,ve been given forms from the willow foundation to eventually organise a special day for myself.I will talk about that another time because I would love some of you guys to be there.Finally I have received a signed team photo and signed certificate from the club so thanks to whoever set that up.Leon thanks for the banner mate although I haven’t seen it you’re a star.My eyesight is at the moment and I need my morphine so see you all when I can.
YNWA BACK AT YA,LOVE THE CLUB,LOVE THE FANS,LOVE THE CITY.
I WILL FIGHT AS HARD AS I CAN GOD WILLING.
PHIL

[laza]

Welcome back mate
Hope your around for a long time to come

YNWA

[Effes]

Phil, although we don't know each other, I feel very touch and humbled (as Peewee said).
Any problems I have have paled into insignificance.

You seem to have the fighting spirit that the Reds had in Istanbul.
What spirit is, man can be.

[greenred]

Christ mate,that is almost impossible to respond to.Im not sure what to say,cos you have literally broken my heart.
I mentioned in another thread that i got a prayer said for you this morning Phil.Two hundred kids prayed for you,two hundred kids that didnt even know you.They know about you now though.Your love of Liverpool fc,your passion,your humour,your heart.

One hundred and ninety nine French kids(plus one Irish lad) are supporting you Phil.Dont give up the fight mate,dont give up the fight.

[babu]

Dear Phil,

What i find most amazing about what you just told us is; this was all happening while you have been posting on this message board, but not once did i see you post anything bitter. You have managed to keep your humour and positive attitude (at least while posting). You are a real credit to us all.

I'm not a religous person, but i'll say a prayer for you.

YNWA

[anti-hero]

If you ever need some extra strength..



We're all right here.

[The Red Baron]

Friggin ell were do Istart after reading that.You have shown us all how strong and brave you are,and you have my utmost respect.I knew you were ill,but not once did you come on here wollowing in self pity,and who could of blamed you if you had.
You have always posted on here with good humour,and your love of the club can be seen by all who read your posts.This forum has missed you,we all welcome you back like the prodical son.
We know there are tough times ahead,but I know Ispeak for all of us when I say WE ARE WITH YOU ALL THE WAY.

In the DrummerPhil thread I signed off some of my posts with the words;

Come on you mighty Red,....You have shown us all just how mighty you are.

Looking forward to reading loads more of your posts, God bless

                           Phil

[woof woof !]

Fantastic to see you in here again Phil . 

[bigmick]

The thanks is from us mate, to you for bringing perspective, reality and the real meaning of life sharply into focus. To imagine that you were suffering in this manner while posting all those times with he humour and insisive observation that you did is nothing short of unbelieveable. That you are considered one of the funniest blokes on the forum and as such it was fitting that Lando was the fella who visited you, and all the the time you were in this sort of state absolutely beggars belief.

You don't need to thank anybody on here Phil. We think of you every day. Top man.

[gato_busta]

You don't need to thank anybody on here Phil. We think of you every day. Top man.

I agree with bigmick, It is us who should thank you. Reading your post I couldn't help but shed a tear. Your strength is an inspiration to us all. I can't believe all you were going through and still find the strength to come into the forum and share that great sense of humor with us all. Its an honor to be able to share the forum with you.

Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart

YNWA Phil