Liverpool FC Forum

[Roger Red Hat]

Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their colleagues.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realise the importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with colleagues.

Therefore, a list of 13 new and innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1.
Try Saying: I think you could do with more training
Instead Of: You don't have a f*ing clue, do you?

2.
Try Saying: She's an aggressive go-getter
Instead Of: She's a f*ing power-crazy B*tch!

3.
Try Saying: Perhaps I can work late
Instead Of: And when the f**k do you expect me to do this?

4.
Try Saying: I'm certain that it isn't feasible
Instead Of: F*8k off a*se-wipe

5.
Try Saying: Really?
Instead Of: Well f*ck me backwards with a telegraph pole!

6.
Try Saying: Perhaps you should check with...
Instead Of: Tell someone who gives a f*8k

7.
Try Saying: I wasn't involved in the project
Instead Of: Not my f*ing problem, mate

8.
Try Saying: That's interesting
Instead Of: What the f*8k?

9.
Try Saying: I'm not sure this can be implemented within the given timescale

Instead Of: No f*ing chance mate

10.
Try Saying: It will be tight, but I'll try to schedule it in
Instead Of: Why the f*8k didn't you tell me that yesterday?

11.
Try Saying: He's not familiar with the issues
Instead Of: He's got his head up his F*ing a*se!

12.
Try Saying: Excuse me, sir?
Instead Of: Oi! F*8k face

13.
Try Saying: Of course, I was only going to be at home anyway
Instead Of: Yeah, who needs f*ing holidays anyway

Thank You

Human Resources

[EddieC]

Quality

[Sabre]

That was funny.

And useful too! Stu, read that!

[account deleted by request]

Cracker that Lee J 

[Ola Mr Benitez]

Excellent.

An excellent piece of work (instead of Fu  cki n great read)