Liverpool FC Forum

by stmichael » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:11 pm

time to reel off some of the funniest footballing co#k-ups you have heard from football commentators down the years. i'll start and feel free to join in.

clive tyldsely. everton vs arsenal last season. rooney had just scored his first goal for everton and then tried an audacious chip a few minutes later.

"that's the first time i've seen someone try to lob seaman twice in two minutes"     priceless.

by stmichael » Mon Apr 26, 2004 2:59 pm

or big ron saying:

"there's just not enough penetration"

by Dalglish » Mon Apr 26, 2004 4:07 pm

The less said about Big Ron the better at this time !!!!!!   Forget commentators , I once turned to my mate at the match and said "The problem is Fowlers not feeding off McManamans' balls !!!!!! Laugh ?...... I nearly bought a round

by Leonmc0708 » Mon Apr 26, 2004 6:02 pm

Here are some classics from good old john Motson......

And that's England's finest victory over the Germans since the war.
We know what you meant, Motty. We hope...


Pinch yourselves please.

Motty is beside himself as England's fourth goes in against Germany.


And how ironic that the time on the clock is 66.

Motty turns Alanis in two thousandth 1966 reference of that evening.


"Trevor Brooking's notes are getting wet with the rain. I must lend him some of the perspex I always bring to cover mine."

You knew in your heart and soul that Motty would never be without carefully trimmed perspex to protect his lovingly compiled stats, didn't you?



I've just heard that in the other match Real Madrid have just scored. That makes the score, if my calculations are correct, 4-3! But I'm only guessing!

Maths never was Motty's strong suit.


I have to say, he's done as well as anyone out there.

Not at all patronisingly, Motty is impressed with Japanese player Nakata's performance for Roma against Liverpool last season.


Brazil - they're so good it's like they are running around the pitch playing with themselves.

A touch of the Jimmy Magees, who suggested that Ardiles stroked the ball like it was part of his anatomy.


And what a time to score. 22 minutes gone.

I suppose, ironically, 22 is one-third of 66 and England have one-third the number of world cups the German's do.


You couldn't count the number of moves Alan Ball made...I counted four and possibly five.

Abacas-wielding Motson always keeps on top of things for his more mathemathically challenged audience.


Nearly all the Brazilian supporters are wearing yellow shirts - it's a fabulous kaleidoscope of colour!'

Kaleidoscopes not much cop around Motson way.


That's an old Ipswich move - O'Callaghan crossing for Mariner to drive over the bar.'

It's actually true, Bobby Robson perfected that manoeuver back in his Ipswich days. He's lately been working on a sequel involving Nobby Solano.


...so different from the scenes in 1872, at the cup final none of us can remember.

What is it about 1872... such a  forgettable game.


and the classic

For those of you watching in black and white, Spurs are in the yellow strip.'


       

JUSTICE FOR THE 96

by dawson99 » Tue Apr 27, 2004 9:18 pm

Big Ron was the king, heres the proof:

Scholes and Van Nistelrooy drugged the last two defenders.
-- Ron Atkinson 
   Well, Clive, it's all about the two M's - movement and positioning.
-- Ron Atkinson 
The midfield is outnumbered numerically.
-- Ron Atkinson 
   For me their biggest threat is when they get into the attacking part of the field.
-- Ron Atkinson 
   Zero-zero is a big score.
-- Ron Atkinson 
   The keeper was unsighted - he still didn't see it.
-- Ron Atkinson 
   Julian Dicks has been everywhere ... it's like West Ham have got eleven Dicks out there.
-- Anonymous (Metro city radio)
   There's nobody fitter at his age, except maybe Raquel Welch.
-- Ron Atkinson (Ron commenting on 39 year old Scot Gordon Strachan


and the classic unknown quote::: i wish this were true

...and now it's Keane with Butt spread wide...

0118 999 881 999 119 7253

by cheesecakery » Tue Apr 27, 2004 9:47 pm

'the pitch is in tremendous condition'...
Des Lynam- Wembley 1992